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(Atheist stuff - Hipster stuff - Animal stuff)
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100 - What dogs really love about their owners

Totally recycled, just new eyebrows and background colors, and I feel plenty bad about it.


99 - Are all dogs bulimic?

You know, dogs. I'm pretty happy how the hair turned out on these, but less happy that I didn't change the mouths around from one comic to the next.

Originally I wanted to, but the way I built it just wasn't conducive to changes. Lesson learned.


98 - Dogs burping up their lunch... gross.

Recyled art from the previous one, almost entirely, but I put so much time into it, I figured it was good enough.

Dogs are silly and gross, figured this might capture them pretty well.


97 - Dogs have a short attention... what?

First comic back since a while, and I'm so-so happy with it. Grey dog is good, Wookie dog not as much.

I immediately realized the tongues were a problem, but it felt too late to fix them.


96 - Your girl loves you, so... Threesome?

I hadn't said it before, but the art was based on a Photoshopped collage of assorted pictures. I put them together, redrew them from scratch. Pretty happy with the outcome. Plenty unique.

As to the meat of the potatoes, well, um, I'll withhold my comments on this matter... but you know how I feel. Sorry baby.


95 - New Orleans Tranny Club

When I visited New Orleans in my 20s, my mother actually invited me to join her at a tranny club. I respectfully declined, opting to take in the music of Bourbon Street instead.

Later she said it was classy and artful, while my step-dad just shook his head in sickened disapproval. Oh mom, why must you love chicks with dicks?


94 - New Orleans Plantation Tour

I took one of these, and had a conversation very much like this with a co-worker when I returned. The genders were all flipped, but the basic resolution was the same.

This is using my new pen tablet to make eyebrows, lines, shading and what-not. Notice how the mouths are more dynamic than before.


93 - New Orleans Shots

I just imagined I could go back to the city beneath the sea, and with someone special... in this case a black girl in a tight dress.

The fact that she's more "party" than me should tell you something, especially since she's imaginary. I'm using the new Penguin eyes I made a few weeks back, and I like them. The joke is terrible, but I stand by it.


92 - You look nice... so... can we?

It's the age-old friendzone question... so whenna we gonna surrender and DO THIS???

It's a fair question though... you know who you are... when are we going to do this?


91 - Stepping up the Friendzone situation

Happy to say I've never been in this situation, but when feelings aren't reciprocated, however small they may be, it can be cripplingly painful.

This is another from this set of images (3rd I think) which was based on a photo I bought, then totally transformed.


90 - You know what, I LIKE you!

Almost all of us have been in this situation, from one side or the other... what do you do when there's a statement of love that can't be reciprocated?

Well, in this instance, talk about baseball, of course.J


89 - What is "unconditional love"?

This was one of a batch that was drawn and discarded. The art just sucked and I knew I could do better, no matter how much time I flushed down the drain making it so.

This is kind of how I feel when I'm in a "loving" relationship. They love you until it's inconvenient, then they call you the devil.


88 - Toddler Tells me to Shut Up

You know how it is, your kids try to take charge, and sometimes, they actually win out. It's very much wrong to let this happen, but it does sometimes happen.

The art is very much recycled with new colors and faces, but I'm too tired to make it all new. I've got plenty of those drafted, and I'll do them, but not today.


87 - Hot Ex Kinda Wants This Again

Ever known an ex who intoxicates you? Who makes you dream of her (or him) daily? Ever wondered about the path you could have taken? Well, yeah, kind of that.

The art is still recycled, but since I didn't make anything in almost two weeks, I'm just happy to crank this new batch out and get a gaggle done.

Now that I have the Bamboo tablet, the art can only improve from here. I still assume I'll get nasty, evil comments on Reddit, but that's okay with me.


86 - Met a Hotty on Reddit

Ever met a fine philly on the internet? Well, yeah, hate to break it to you, but that was a dude.

This is more recycled art, and I'll make it more unique in the future, but until people actually start reading my comics, I simply can't justify it. I've got the ability to up my skills by a good 30-50%, but, you know, I'm just waiting for a reason.


85 - I Love the Smell of Cocaine

It's important to care about our friends, but it's arguably more important to find them a cheaper hook-up for their drug habbit.

I'm not on any drugs, though I understand the allure. Do it once, fall in love, dedicate every last thread of your being to keeping that addiction alive. It's sad, but it's chemical.

This was inpired by a Family Guy episode where Brian (the dog) became a drug sniffer, and quickly thereafter, a coke-head. Just struck me funny.


84 - 40th Birthday Party

Imagine you turned 40, threw a magnificent party at tremendous expense, and nobody had the decency to even show up. That' bad, but what's worse is the guy later pretending he actually came, though plainly he didn't.

This is the first comic using the Bamboo pen-tablet. It's really great. Pressure sensitive and fairly responsive. The guys in this one are recycled, but wholly redrawn from scratch.

Notice the wicked detail in thier hair. I plan to expand that in later comics, hopefully to include flesh shading


83 - Causal (casual?) Penguin Gets Philosophical

Obviously recycled art from yesterday, and a badly made joke jammed into it at that... I apologize, but so it goes.

I'd like to think if I was Gary Larson, you could just look at the joke and tell yourself you're not smart enough to get it, even though the truth is that I wasn't smart enough to sell it in the first place.

This is the last comic drawn on a mouse. After this one, everything uses the Bamboo tablet, which promises to be awesome.


82 - Casual Friday Penguins

Did some unique art on this one. Whole new batch of eyes I might keep using. Happy to make the penguin fat; deserves it what with his fat-rich diet.

Even gave it a 100% unique background, which I also might do more of in the future. Colored and shaded this thing like crazy, with fair results. Had suggestions to make this one better, but just couldn't bring myself to do it.


81 - Shoplifting for fun, profit, and normal business practices

It just makes sense. Stores assume a certain percentage of theft. If we don't live up to it, who will? If we don't steal, we'll throw off their numbers.

Sure, we'll go to jail for trying to stuff a single shirt in our pants, when it only would have cost $8, but that's an occupational hazard, as a professional thief. Sort of thing you just have to accept.

For fun, I 100% recyled the art from an atheist comic, as the principle remains the same.


80 - Hipsters without Instagram, can it be?

Poking fun on about three levels here, but the central theme remains. If it isn't hip, or hip enough, it just isn't pre-cool enough to pass.

Pretty happy that I was still able to find unique colors for this one after eight consecutive hipster comics from the same template. Didn't mix it up as much as I'd have liked to (no new arms) but the faces are all still unique, as are the colors.


79 - How much do five hipsters weigh?

This is a muddle of a bunch of other hipster jokes found on the web, none with any real origin to speak of.

I know I've been poking fun at hipsters a lot lately, but it will end very soon, as there isn't a whole hell of a lot left to be said about them. I could be wrong.


78 - Hipster solar eclipse

Why wasn't the solar eclipse just plain cool enough for a hipster? If you've read this far, it's likely you already know the answer. It just wasn't obscure enough.


77 - Why did the Hipster cross the road (Part Two)

We can deny that we're both hipsters, but that doesn't change the cold, hard truth, obscure tastes aside.

Art is recyled, but it was hard earned in the first place, so I make no apologies.


76 - Why did the Hipster cross the road (Part One)

The joke is that it has to be rare and obscure, and that failing to recognize that makes one de facto not a hipster.

I explain that, but it's very likely you already got the joke, or that an explanation won't help you.


OLDER PAGE


A | to | W | X | Y | Z
(Atheist stuff - Hipster stuff - Animal stuff)
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ABOUT - This is a sometimes webcomic about, you know, kind of whatever. There's no set format (yet), so whatever is funny goes to print. I've only been doing webcomics since the last week of March, 2013, so it's not all that refined just yet. Don't worry, I'm working on it.

If the title of a comic is a hyperlink, that means it's live on GlossyNews.com, and you can go there to post your comments about it. You won't, but it's still an option. Just looking out for you.


FAQ

How do you make your comics?
Badly, if at all. I do layer upon layer in PhotoShop Elements, which I got free with a pen tablet. I'll get Adobe Illustrator soon enough, just don't have the budget for it just yet, or the capacity to figger it out.

Where did you learn your mad skillz?
Mostly nowhere, but I lean pretty heavily on photographs, then try to replicate them... badly. I've learned a lot from a decade of using Photoshop at various jobs, which helps streamline the process. I like to look at existing art and photos and sketch it out from there, though it doesn't always work the way I'd like.

Where do you draw your inspiration?
Only from the best. The Far Side, xkcd, explosm, the Atheist Pig and too many more to mention.

Come on, who actually asks these questions?
Nobody yet. Just trying to stay ahead of the curve.


CONTACT
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