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(Atheist stuff - Hipster stuff - Animal stuff)

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If the headline is a hyperlink, that means it's already run on GlossyNews.com, and you can follow the link to post comments about it, even on Facebook. Feedback is always appreciated, even the negative kind.

-- Animal-Related Cartoons --
This page has ONLY my animal-related cartoons. To see the rest of the comics go to www.GlossyNews.com/c

115 - Study: Indoor Cats Also Present Owners w/ Gifts

Yeah, just more cat stuff. Nothing really to say about it. I regret putting an orange patch by the left cat's nose, I regret not removing fur lines from the insides of the mouths.

You'll almost surely never see this pair again.

114 - Artist Refuses to Admit Art is Terrible

This is my second attempt with backgrounds other than the standard, and it was a ton of work to come out with something I still think is so-so at best.

At this point I'm getting pretty sick of the cats, but I'll do one more, even though I have more written for cats after that.

113 - Scientific Study Proves Cats Have No Sense of Humor

My first attempt at using a background other than a gradient or solid color... not great. Not bad, but not as good as it looked in my head.

Still recycled art, but for some reason, this time I forgot the damn eyebrows. Still works without them, but annoying to me.

112 - Specialty Cats Bred Exclusively to be Creepy

Just trying to channel the inner monologue of cats. Maybe it's not so sinister, but probably it is.

If you've never had a conversation with a cat (be honest) you don't know what they're thinking.

111 - Feline Study Finds Lasers Effective for Hair Removal

Laser hair removal? Yeah, for your cat, just shine the pointer right there and they'll chew the hell out of it.

And yes, to be clear, that's my best take on Grumpy Cat on the right.

110 - Cat-Rehab Clinics Sprouting Up Around the Nation

So then I took it a bit further. What are cats really like? They're not human but they can still have human characteristics.

Recycled art with just a few changes.

109 - Happy 4th of July, Especially if you're a cat

I wanted to do something special for the 4th of July and I figured dogs hate it, so cats must love that.

The art is pretty bad, I can admit that. You might recognize my inspiration for the guy on the right.

108 - You know what's great about being a dog?

This was actually the first dog cartoon I wrote from the new batch, though the last I made. The shifting font size was a cramp in my ass, so I put it off as long as I could.

No more dogs for a while, I promise. ;p

107 - Dogs... sometimes they just HAVE TO ruin the house

Same recycled art. New colors, new eyebrows, new mouths, blah blah blah.

Basically I just tried to channel what dogs think and feel, and sometimes they just feel like destroying a house.

106 - Why don't dogs get to vote?

This time I added some facial expression to the yellow dog, though to almost zero effect. Tried to make my dogs political, but without much success.

At this point I realize I should create a new sub-page just for dogs, since I've got something like 15 at this point.

105 - Some dogs, shamefully, actually LIKE cats

Same art from before, but now it dawns on me that they look more like humans in ill-fitting suits.

All these dog cartoons are using a new font, and I'm not 100% convinced by it. It's about as hard to read as the previous one, so I'm still not sure what I'm going to do.

104 - What happens when a dog escapes from the yard?

Same art, better execution. All new eyebrows, but 100% custom mouths on the gray dog, and what a difference it makes.

But other than that, ya know, dogs... amirite?

103 - Dog savagely kills a plush rabbit

Same situation, all new dogs. Once again the gray one looks great, the other one not quite as much.

Didn't vary the mouths on this one, an oversight, and didn't even fill them all in... I'll fix it on the next one.

102 - Some dogs are more PC than others

Basically I have this huge master-document of potential ideas, and they fall into categories. I finally had enough dog stories to make it happen, so there you go.

Although I still had a bunch more dog comics, I gave up on this template after this one, and the next one is... well let's just say "better", for conversational purposes.

101 - Dogs are referred to in the gender neutral "it"

Yep, same art again. New eyebrows and background colors, but that's about it. Pretty sad about that.

Though I guess I'll do one more in the same template.

100 - What dogs really love about their owners

Totally recycled, just new eyebrows and background colors, and I feel plenty bad about it.

99 - Are all dogs bulimic?

You know, dogs. I'm pretty happy how the hair turned out on these, but less happy that I didn't change the mouths around from one comic to the next.

Originally I wanted to, but the way I built it just wasn't conducive to changes. Lesson learned.

98 - Dogs burping up their lunch... gross.

Recyled art from the previous one, almost entirely, but I put so much time into it, I figured it was good enough.

Dogs are silly and gross, figured this might capture them pretty well.

97 - Dogs have a short attention... what?

First comic back since a while, and I'm so-so happy with it. Grey dog is good, Wookie dog not as much.

I immediately realized the tongues were a problem, but it felt too late to fix them.

83 - Causal (casual?) Penguin Gets Philosophical

Obviously recycled art from yesterday, and a badly made joke jammed into it at that... I apologize, but so it goes.

I'd like to think if I was Gary Larson, you could just look at the joke and tell yourself you're not smart enough to get it, even though the truth is that I wasn't smart enough to sell it in the first place.

This is the last comic drawn on a mouse. After this one, everything uses the Bamboo tablet, which promises to be awesome.

82 - Casual Friday Penguins

Did some unique art on this one. Whole new batch of eyes I might keep using. Happy to make the penguin fat; deserves it what with his fat-rich diet.

Even gave it a 100% unique background, which I also might do more of in the future. Colored and shaded this thing like crazy, with fair results. Had suggestions to make this one better, but just couldn't bring myself to do it.

52 - Honestly, how much IS that doggy in the window?

Thought of this one at work too. It came in a number of phases. The original joke was just the first two panels, then the rest came to me a good 6-hours later.

I'd have had it done sooner, but the artwork was daunting. I wanted more from it, but I'm still happy with it for what it is. That blank white space behind dude-left is a door, by the way... not obvious.

30 - The Legend of Johnny Appleseed

I spent way too much time on this. Probably more than three-hours. It was a joke I came up with maybe two years ago, but drawing it out was extremely labor intensive.

The tree and Johnny were both modeled on existing images, but I very much made them my own. You can tell because I can't draw hands or feet. I introduced the first real mouth I've ever drawn, and a level of detail on the eyes that is new. The sprigs of grass, however, were purchased.

15 - Hay is for horses?

This one was supposed to be used as a way to explore new aspects and angles for expression, specifically eyes, but it just... didn't happen. Also modified Clip-Art horses.

13 - Amazing Talking Dog

This was the most original thing I'd thought up in a while. Came up with it listening to a story on NPR about a rescue dog. Tinkered with the punchline for a solid ten-hours before settling on this one, though I'm still second guessing.

The dog, hat and bone are all heavily modified Clip Art, but the facial expressions really show some growth over earlier attempts. This is also the first use of a font other than Comic Sans, and I must say, it's a refreshing change. No going back from that.


A | to | W | X | Y | Z
(Atheist stuff - Hipster stuff - Animal stuff)

ABOUT - This is a sometimes webcomic about, you know, kind of whatever. There's no set format (yet), so whatever is funny goes to print. I've only been doing webcomics since the last week of March, 2013, so it's not all that refined just yet. Don't worry, I'm working on it.

If the title of a comic is a hyperlink, that means it's live on GlossyNews.com, and you can go there to post your comments about it. You won't, but it's still an option. Just looking out for you.


How do you make your comics?
Badly, if at all. I do layer upon layer in PhotoShop Elements, which I got free with a pen tablet. I'll get Adobe Illustrator soon enough, just don't have the budget for it just yet, or the capacity to figger it out.

Where did you learn your mad skillz?
Mostly nowhere, but I lean pretty heavily on photographs, then try to replicate them... badly. I've learned a lot from a decade of using Photoshop at various jobs, which helps streamline the process. I like to look at existing art and photos and sketch it out from there, though it doesn't always work the way I'd like.

Where do you draw your inspiration?
Only from the best. The Far Side, xkcd, explosm, the Atheist Pig and too many more to mention.

Come on, who actually asks these questions?
Nobody yet. Just trying to stay ahead of the curve.

Use the contact form on Glossy News.