Entertainment
Jim Morrison's Corpse Faces Rape Charge
By Johnny Dupe
Oct 31, 2003, 09:30

For a 60-year-old corpse of a drug-bloated hippy rock star, Morrison appeared surprisingly in shape. However, he did not respond to reporters questions regarding his sexual health.

Paris, France - A California woman in Paris to visit the grave of Jim Morrison has filed charges against the deceased singer, accusing him of rape. Morrison is being held in a Paris jail awaiting an upcoming court battle which should cause a media frenzy.

53-year-old Martha Siedel, who's name is being kept confidential, claims Morrison forced her to perform various sex acts on him while he "played dead". Martha Siedel's attorney, Matthew Gates, made a brief statement to the press today.

"Being dead for 30 years does NOT let a person off the hook when it comes to the law. Even a rotting 60's rock star is accountable for his actions, regardless if he's an alledged corpse with no visible penis."

Renowned lawyer Johnnie Cochran will once again take on the challenge of defending a celebrity. When asked whether being a charismatic rock star was an advantage or disadvantage in this case, he responded, "Are you high on crack? The man's DEAD!"

"My client has no pulse," continued Cochran. "Man with no pulse got no place being put on trial. Hell, the man has no FACE. He's got no face and they've got no case. Lemme tell you, my man Morrison just didn't do it. When you dead, you don't get head!"

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