back to Glossy News front page


 In the news...   Top Stories   Biz News   Entertainment   Horoscopes   KidZone   Health   Sports   Technnologizzy   Community 
Closeted Gay Man Finds Out That Friends And Family Read MySpace Profile
By The Lean Jeff
Aug 28, 2007, 15:00
Email This Article
 Printer friendly page

Filmore's Tell-Tale Detail Matrix
DAYTON, OH - Closeted Gay man Hubert Filmore discovered that his real life friends actually read his MySpace profile Saturday.

Gay MySpace User Hubert Filmore -- Although Filmore was officially still in the closet and had not disclosed his sexual orientation to any of his friends or family, he had chosen the "Gay" selection on the MySpace profile editor."I never realized that I knew anyone who would actually read it," said Filmore at a press conference this morning.

Filmore, a bulldozer owner and construction subcontractor who once enjoyed sexual anonymity among his circle of influence, was confronted by his friend Jerry Sparco yesterday with allegations that he had accidentally chosen "Gay" for his MySpace profile.

"...and I think you were trying to type 'I like meatballs in my pasta,' but you accidentally typed 'i like meat and balls in my arsehole,'" Sparco told Filmore.

Filmore, unable to lie, confirmed that the phrasing was intentional. Minutes later, he received phone calls with similar assertions from his parents, brother, and co-workers.

"I had no idea so many people I knew used MySpace," said Filmore. "I wish I could still lie and tell everyone it was a prank someone played on me, but I already posted a picture of myself making out with a Mario Lopez poster.




get your satire published
Chemicals, telecomm, bio-engineering, security services, world domination and more... yes, I said world domination
Google
Web Glossy News


Latest Headlines in
Community

Tribal Native Denies "Being a Ninja", Secretly Dreams

Afghan Election Results Officially Recognized as FUBAR

Common Purpose? - Dial 666

Cops Can't be Trusted with Fines

Teachers Stigmatize Pupils Due Birth Names

>> More Stories

-- Link to us --

Glossy News

Glossy News

-- Sponsors --
Amazing Photo Essays
Drunkage.com - The Drunk Dial Site
StrangleCorp - Barely Evil as Haliburton
Random Generator Humor
Heatherwood Apartments
Christopher Walken
Puerto Rico Travel
Montana With Kids
Mental Dimensions
Speaking Boricua
US Daily Mirror
Parenting Humor
Detective Bacon
About Shanghai
Redtractor-USA
Biting Satire
Side Effects
Pimp Central
Space Opera
AOL Support
Mr. Satire
The Lean
Your ad here as low as $10/month

BBest BBook Evar - Design by ThePublicityFirm.com
  GlossyNews.com: front | us | submit your satire story! | links | advertise reprints/syndication
  Get our LiveFeed  
Copyright © 2002 - 2008 GlossyNews.com, All Rights Reserved.

Web hosting service is sponsored by 2Globalmart.com, a cheap web hosting service providing affordable internet related services