There is a special word for lady dogs, and the first father chose not to use it.
Taking up the difficult charge requested of the nation's newest president, fathers around the country have stepped up to make difficult choices and keep hope alive in the next generation. Many are doing this by emulating the exact behavior of Barack Obama and promising their dog demanding children that they too can have a puppy… you know, when dad gets elected president.
"My kids have been bugging me about getting a dog ever since they saw the preview for 'Hotel for Dogs', and I hate dogs, but I love my kids," explains Will Marble, a legal clerk in Cleveland. "I looked at what that Obama guy did, and yeah, he's a genius. I told my kids they can get a dog like his kids once I'm elected president."
Younger children surveyed, specifically those in the "Santa is real" camp, reported optimism about the prospects of getting a dog. Older children, such as those that know there will not be a new president in four to eight years, and certainly not their own fathers, seemed less satisfied by the resolution.
In a random sampling of minority children conducted on Washington DC avenues ending in "-sylvania", the promise seemed not only reasonable, but already a part of history. Children on other streets are advised to maintain hope, but hold off on buying dog collars and chew toys just yet.
