Willy Kissinger is a pimp with a gift. "I can spot a ho." During the Atlanta pimp strike of 2000 Willy worked as a floater pimp, filling in here and there, brokering some transaction and smacking up some undercover vice cops. When the strike ended he stayed in the game unlike the vast majority of pimp temps who came along at the same time. "When the strike ended one of my competitors was like 'go home scab!' and I was like 'only scabs going home are on my merchandise.'"
He soon upgraded from muppet skin to fur, plated to 14k, city bus to Lincoln low rider, and Schmidt to Old English 800. This weekend at the Pinedale Hilton, Willy is telling and teaching all. For the first time, the secrets are revealed.
"Lotta pimps lack the Ho-Dar. They can't tell a ho from a slut from a bee-ha" explains Willy in his hand written photocopied press packet. "My low cost informational seminar will benefit both the seasoned vet and the aspiring hobbyist pimps."
Franchise opportunities can be had at 3 levels using Willy's patented "Ho your boat to freedom" program. Standard franchise, Protected franchise (where investors can buy in to his exclusive network of informants and police) and Niche Franchise which offers specialty categories such as midgets, elderly and the hideously disfigured.
"Hardest part is spotting the ho. Sometimes she don't even know it herself. Sure you can scout from the competition and get tired and haggard goods, but fresh inventory is key. Next comes inventory control. Are your goods where your customers are? And don't forget accounting. Dollars are only one component. You got cash, rocks, jewels, guns and ass. If you don't know how to balance those and keep exchange rates at the top of your head, you'll be out before you're in. I'm here to help."
Pinedale Hilton. Saturday Evening at 10:00 and Midnight. Admission is $50 in cash or trade, seating is limited.
