"What can I say, the experiment failed" says French interim Prime Minister Jean-Pierre Raffarin. "I think it's safe to say we gave it a fair run but, it's just not our thing."
In the final hours of actual work being done yesterday, France applied for foreign aid in a blanket mass email letter sent to every recognized nation as well as every rebel group, religious group, and even all aspiring land-less nations. "There's a handful of gimme's in the lot who we know are going to do something. The United Nations is always good for a couple Franc's, England still owes us for that whole WWII thing, far as I'm concerned. Then there's a bunch of French speaking countries in Africa who owe us royalties on the language. I think and I heard someone say the break-away Antarctic republic of Ross Ice Shelf was coming to our side too."
Following the announcement unemployment increased only slightly to an unprecedented 100%, but leveled off shortly thereafter. "We don't expect the number as a whole to rise until we have more children." Alcoholism only rose 3% to a total of 46% and absinthe use actually dropped dramatically down to 68%.
A Parisian at a now unstaffed, though fully operational bathhouse offered "Listen to me, we invented kissing with tongue, we invented French ticklers, and I am sure we invented Spanish Fly. Don't listen to those damn Spaniards, they just had bigger billboards. Can't you see this is the life we were made for?" The man's name was withheld upon his insistence that he could not actually remember it.
"We have 1015 years of industry to undo and we intend to take it very seriously," reported the Prime Minister. Neighboring Austria upon hearing the news had initially expressed interest in waging their patiently awaited bid on France but soon after decided against it on account of all the "Frenchies" who still occupy.
