So close to death's doorstep, but as fate would have it: even closer to his best place in history.
With almost every radio and television station broadcasting the inauguration of America's 44th president live, and near universal print and web news coverage on-hand, there was little doubt that many firsts would take place, and at least a few records would be set or broken. A lesser known record – the 'greatest audience booing by number – was not expected by many, but it came to pass. Nearly 2 million people helped outgoing vice president Dick Cheney set the record.
Meegan Fitz, an attendant at the historic event, was within shouting distance when Cheney took the stage. As she explains, "I didn't know [Dick Cheney] was even going to be there, but I heard this loud booing sound all around me and looked up to see his frightening, wheel-chair bound visage on the Jumbotron, and I guess I got swept up in the moment and just started booing myself."
Jason Wilkes, a comptroller from Delaware who took the day off to attend the ceremony, was excited to be part of history. "I knew the deposed regime was eager to get out of Dodge, but I didn't know they'd actually make an appearance. When that dick [Cheney] showed his scary mug, I just knew it was going to be historic, and our last chance to get him in the history books for something other than destroying our country and torturing Afghan farmers."
According to our research, the previous biggest boo on record took place in San Francisco on DATE when The Clear, The Cream and Barry Bonds broke the all-time homerun record. The number of booing spectators on hand was documented at 40,746.
The Guinness Book of World Records has yet to validate the record, but there is no shortage of verifiable evidence, such as ten thousand video recordings, including many from major networks, and perhaps millions of copies recorded on home TiVo and DVR devices.
An official from Guinness, talking to Glossy News off the record, said, "We already had an official there to verify the record of 'first black US president', because unless we had somebody there, come on, it's kind of a tough story to swallow… we will review the 'biggest boo' record, but it could be some weeks before we can officially declare it a record."
No matter how it's measured, fully 2 million people booing a man in a single, massive chorus is truly historic. When Mr. Cheney came out on stage, he had never in his life seen a crowd of that size, and little did he know, they would put him in the history books.
Dick Cheney was not available for comment, as he was already expected to be busy up to time of publication siphoning the souls from children to prolong his life.
