These three men represent a deep insult, not so much to Islam, but to the very idea of comedy itself.
An online sitcom about a group of Islamic suicide bombers living in Bradford, Yorkshire could be more damaging than the real thing, according to the nihilistic ‘Allahu Akbar’ zealots group.
Dr Abdul bin Bagg, of the Manky Muslim Association in Bradford, also claims the series ‘Living with the Infidels’ might upset some young hard-line Wahhabi fundamentalists – especially those belonging to the ultra-radical militant Jolly Jihad sect.
Dr. bin Bagg also said that "the level of indecency and filthy language" was not representative of young Muslims in one segment portraying the group viewing a late night Sky TV Dogging channel and jacking off while watching a group of drunken Aussies bonk a sheep.
Producers of the series, which is made in London, informed the media they have the backing of the Rothshite Zionist Council for Religious Tolerance in Tel Aviv.
Series director Hymie Weaselberg told a reporter from the Sectarian Gazette that the comedy and satire was the best way of dealing with terrorism’s "huge elephant in the living room" reality.
During the six-part series the main characters – all educational drop-out madrassa brainwashed types, set out to become suicide bombers but find that they are a complete set of incompetent wankers and might even appreciate some aspects of Western / Christian ways of life – such as not having your foreskin cut off just to please Allah – and enjoying bacon butties for brekkers.
One of the characters, Mustafa, has a crisis of idealist faith when he realises that signing up for a career as a suicide bomber and running around in a Semtex vest isn’t so glamourous when it actually blows up.
The "yucking yucksters of ha ha" pose flirtatiously for a quick shot with Al Jizeera, one of the most famous secular Islamic fundamentalist photographers of the dark ages.
Achmed too has second thoughts when he learns the job’s long-term employment prospects, profit sharing scheme and pension plan are all more at scent than substance – and goes back to his former job as a halal pole dancer.
However the series has a light-hearted intent, with certain Frank Spencer type farcical interludes, when this group of would-be fanatical extremists are learning to pilot magic carpets with the intent of flying them – bomb-laden - into London’s iconic Gherkin and end up splashing down in the local canal.
Suliman plays the part of the total numpty to a tee – especially so when he researches the English term volunteer on Google and learns the definition is “a person who has totally misunderstood the question put to them.” He then falls over in a fit and shits himself when he sees the actual meaning of the word ‘martyr’.
But the final episode where Suliman and Achmed are stewing up the ingredients of an incendiary device on the stove to explode outside Mr. Shylock’s Fish and Chip shop is a classic of the traditional BBC comedy genre, particularly the segment where they get into the cooking sherry and their bomb recipe becomes mixed up with a Mrs. Beaton’s instant pork dumpling pack is hilarious.
More so perhaps when they blow up the kitchen in the process, then get arrested by MI6 and end up on an extraordinary rendition flight to Italy where they get to play water sports in the Vatican’s dungeons with the local Men in Black – the Jesuit’s Inquisition torturers.
That scene alone should be enough to make a bunch of grumpy old Ayatollahs giggle and piss their pants in hysterics - perhaps.
