Citing unpaid international royalties cheif among her resigns, the aging superstar expressed confidence in the legality of her big move.
Malibu Beach, CA . After the Mattel toy recalls on August 14 and September 5, 2007, Mattel's CEO Robert Eckert announced in an online video that a number of Barbie's houses, condos and various furniture and accessories had been tainted with lead paint and were unusable. He recommended that everyone who had any of these items return them for a refund. And hundreds of thousands of customers were so grateful to Mattel for acting so quickly and with such well-placed concern.
Sadly, one person was left without any recourse for her damaged goods and property - Barbie herself. She was denied any form of restitution for her tainted things. Even a dog and a cat were unmistakably tainted with lead and may have to be put down. Such a complete heart-rending disaster has rarely been recorded in history to this day.
And Barbie has decided to fight back. She has announced her resignation from the Mattel Company, effective September 30, 2007. Rumors have sprung up about the possible shift to rival toy companies, but since Mattel owns them all, it's hard for her to find a new home.
Reached at her Malibu Estate, where she lives with her "friend" of many years, Ken, Barbie said "It is devastating for me - for us. What are we to do now?" She continued, "Ken and I ...didn't know how to run a business, but we had dreams and talent."
Always expressive in his macho way, Ken chimed in, "I believed it was important to a little girl's self-esteem, to play with a doll that has breasts." Over the years, Barbie estimates that there are over a billion of her living somewhere today. Just not quite so many Kens.
When asked to recall some of her most memorable moments, Barbie stared blankly for a bit then recalled, "At the celebration of the Bicentennial in 1976, I remember being buried in the official 'America's Time Capsule'. Then I remember becoming 'Totally Hair Barbie' in 1992. I generated globally over $100 million. That's when Cher began to mimic my hair toss. I beat Oprah that year! The only other year I beat her was in 1998, when I made over $1.7 billion. Not bad for someone who is less than a foot tall."
Barbie has always had her critics. Most say that she reinforces sexism with her unbearably youthful demeanor, her dumb-as-a-rock intelligence and her knock-out, tits-forward physique. To which Barbie is quick to say, "If I was 5 foot 6 instead of my current height, I would be 39-21-33. I think that's pretty smart and it sure is youthful."
She continued with one of her trademarked serious looks, "Being Barbie today is a great deal more than when I began. I work hard teaching girls how to personalize their own Barbie dolls by helping them design, create, play and dream using Barbie™ state-of-the-art software."
