Pappy still hasn't changed his view on "the reefer", but pappy's dead and it's our stoner, ex-hippy parents who run the AARP now.
The American Association of Retired Persons (AARP) will sponsor a smoke-in to promote the group’s campaign to legalize marijuana. The weekend event, called the Lucky Pot Luck Festival, will be held at Daytona International Speedway in Florida, February 25-27. Sponsors include Viagra, Grecian Formula, Cialis, Fixodent, Depends, Levitra, and Correctol with Stool Softener.
AARP’s chief executive officer, William Novelli, held a press conference in the group’s Washington, D.C., office yesterday to publicize the event. Wearing a Bob Marley T-shirt, Novelli told reporters, "People who think the AARP is a haven for old farts who sit around comparing HMOs or discussing their bowel movements are in for a surprise. According to a recent survey, nearly three-quarters of our members use marijuana on a regular basis not only to alleviate pain from a variety of ailments or mitigate our glaucoma, but primarily to relax after the grandkids go home."
Novelli said that country music legend Willie Nelson will act as master of ceremonies for the festival. Among the other performers scheduled to appear are Barry Manilow, Wayne Newton, The Captain & Tennille, Bill Cosby, Chicago, Rod Stewart, Tony Orlando, John Tesh, the Fire House Polka Brigade, and Close to You, a Carpenters tribute band.
In addition to the stellar entertainment lineup, the festival will feature arts-and-crafts workshops, bingo tents, lottery and term life insurance machines, and vendors offering the finest in gluten-free rolling papers, marijuana suppositories, pressure-free roach clips, and other paraphernalia.
It's not just for glaucoma any more.
AARP is also sponsoring a Pot Luck cooking contest open to anyone attending the festival. Entries will be judged on their creative use of marijuana in a casserole, stew, or dessert. A lifetime subscription to the AARP Magazine, formerly known as Modern Maturity, will be awarded to the winner.
Novelli said he expects more than 50,000 (elderly) people to attend the festival. The campground will open Monday, February 21st, at noon. Advanced life support and Medivac units will be available through the weekend, as will free blood-pressure monitoring, chiropractic and diabetes screening. Concerts will begin promptly at 3:30 each evening. All activities and rest rooms at the festival will be wheelchair accessible, and changing stations will be on hand for those less restroom inclined.
